Face Value

I often find myself losing my temper in a big way over small things. I get so wrapped up in a tiny thing that rubs me the wrong way; I translate it into something that although it might just mean often is completely in the wrong direction. Always, I find myself making connections, patterns, and intuitive leaps over everything in life, and I fear that though this a good trait of mind to have, at times, it is not when it comes to keeping my temper and not blowing things out of proportion.
Some call it a turn for the dramatic, but I don't reference it that way because I know myself too well to know what I am not. I like to think of my little peculiarity as just that, a peculiarity. It is not dramatic. It is actually quite calm in its nature: a reflective pondering upon the meaning of a small something, the sense of something wrong or being wronged, and the intuition (or so I tell myself) to understand a thing for what it really is. It is my belief that actions, words, and events are never what they appear to be and are often the result of suppressed feelings or the polar opposite of what is expressed. Inner turmoil is almost always overlooked these days because we are so wrapped up in our own. Taking things at face value is not safe in my eyes. I can always find an ulterior motive, and often I am spot on. Observe. Interpret. Conclude. This is the daily functioning of my brain at every moment. Small things always catch my eye. The big picture is all in the details. And this is my nature.
Sometimes said nature is problematic. When my emotions are involved, my connections and intuitive leaps are often faulty. Reason has subsided, and sentiment has taken over! Ladies and gentlemen, take note, that no matter what the movies may imply, this is never good. Without reason, emotions lose their flavor, their unique vulnerability, and their truth at human nature's core. Emotions are rebellious, and it is our reason that renders us sane and allows us to enjoy or suffer happiness, grief, envy, and anger. Anger and envy thrive on picking at a wound and making it worse so that one can savor it in all its twisted glory. And then, self-pity inevitably follows. Add those intuitive leaps into the mix and you've made anger's goal more easily accomplished because your reason has helped it along.
So, step back, Chloe; ignore the details and take it at face value because every once in awhile, that's all it is and that's all it's worth.